


It's Only a Crime If I Get Caught

by scarfy36



Category: Glee
Genre: Alternate Universe - Criminals, Criminal!Kurt, F/F, Gen, M/M, basically it's somewhere between a white collar and con man au, criminal!blaine, criminal!klaine, white collar au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-03-30
Updated: 2015-07-23
Packaged: 2018-01-17 13:12:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1388923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scarfy36/pseuds/scarfy36
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Why do I always get paired up with Santana for these things?”<br/>“At least you’re not the bartender.”<br/>“At least you’re not pretending to be straight.”<br/>“Why are we running this con again, Blaine?”<br/>“Because if we can get account information from them, we can get at least four million dollars in 5 minutes.”</p><p>Or: Blaine, Nick, Jeff and Santana are con-artists and Kurt has history with Blaine.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. 8 years since Blaine has seen Kurt

“I’ve got the cameras on a loop, Blaine,” Nick said into the comms unit. “You’re all set.”

“Santana’s got the mark distracted,” Jeff informed them. “She’s _very_ distracted,” he added, watching Santana’s hand slide up the heiress’ leg. Clearly she didn’t mind spending her whole gala with one person if that person was Santana.

“Jeff, make sure no one else comes down this hallway while I’m down here,” Blaine responded.

“Got it.”

“I’m almost into the vault, just a few more – shit.” Blaine turned around when he felt the presence behind him.

“What’s wrong? Blaine? I didn’t see anyone go down the corridor from this end,” Jeff said, the voice barely registering in Blaine’s ear as he began to recognise who was standing in front of him.

“Kurt?” Blaine asked, his eyes widening in surprise. The man in front of him had aged in the 8 years since he’d last seen him, and he was looking fantastic in a well-tailored suit.

“Who the hell is Kurt?” Nick shouted into the comms. “I can’t see anything while the cameras are on the loop. Blaine, do we need to go to the emergency plan?”

“No it’s fine, Nick. Just buy me a few more minutes,” Blaine said, reassuring his crew.

 “You’ve got a team here?” Kurt asked, raising his eyebrows. “I’m impressed.”

“You carrying?”

“After what happened last time? God no,” Kurt laughed.

“Are you going to leave us be, or are you pulling something of your own?”

“I was just scoping the place out, but I can’t say I don’t want in on whatever you’ve got going on.”

Blaine ran a hand through his hair and looked at his watch, calculating how much time he had wasted. “Fine, help me get this open and you can take whatever you like.”

“Who the hell is this guy, Blaine?” Nick asked. Blaine ignored him, turning back to the vault and the man he had been recently reacquainted with.

“Jeff, is the mark still occupied?”

“She’s making bedroom eyes at Santana, she’ll be occupied for a while.”

It took Blaine less than a minute to finish cracking the vault and he wasn’t disappointed by what he found inside. Stacks of cash and priceless jewellery sat beside the small sculpture he had planning to take for months. It was a clever plan, to steal an already stolen statue so that it couldn’t be reported missing. And if there happened to be a few stacks of cash and the odd jewel missing, well she would hardly notice it.

“You got what you want?” Blaine asked the man beside him. “We have about two minutes before the guards are due to check on the cameras.”

“I’m all set,” Kurt grinned, stuffing a wad of cash into his inside pocket.

“When we get out of here, we are having a serious talk.”

“Seconded,” Nick agreed through the comms.

Blaine didn’t return to the main ballroom, but once he was outside the back entrance with Kurt beside him, he signalled for the rest of his crew to make their exits as well.

Nick was the first one out and he was sizing Kurt up immediately, looking to Blaine for an explanation. Jeff followed not long after, informing them that Santana was still with the mark. Nick and Jeff left together, while Blaine waited for Santana. He slipped his address and number into Kurt’s pocket when Kurt told him he had to leave, hoping the other man got the hint.

“Santana, I need you out here before anyone notices anything,” Blaine said, and he got a reply soon after into his earpiece.

“I’m on my way now, she was far too clingy,” Santana replied. “Great boobs though.”

Together they returned to Blaine’s apartment, which had become the usual headquarters for their escapades. As soon as she was inside the door, Santana had taken her heels off and flopped onto his couch.

“If I’m having that much fun flirting with a mark, I need to get laid.”

“That makes two of us,” Blaine agreed, loosening his tie and undoing his top buttons.

“So are you going to tell me what the hell happened back there?” she questioned him. “Who is he and why did you let him take what he wanted from the vault? We spent weeks planning this and he’s allowed to waltz in there and take what he wanted?”

“He’s… an old friend, to put it simply. I owed him a favour from a while ago and I couldn’t exactly let him go after what he saw me doing.”

She looked at him, unconvinced, and finally said, “There’s more to it than that. Considering you still have my cut of the heist, I’m not going to stay quiet for now though.”

Blaine went into his bedroom to change out of his suit, and there was a knock at the door as he emerged buttoning up his jeans. Santana shoved the bag from the heist under the couch before Blaine answered the door.

“Puberty’s been good to you, Anderson,” Kurt smirked, leaning against the doorway.

“Santana, I’ll have your cut in the morning,” Blaine said pointedly.

“I’ll back at 8 for it. You better have it, hobbit,” she said, sliding her heels back on and slipping past Kurt in the doorway with a wink.

“Are you going to let me in or are you going to stand there eye-fucking me all day?” Kurt asked with a laugh.

Blaine stepped back from the doorway and closed the door behind the other man silently. He didn’t know what to say to the man who had reappeared in his life after 8 years of absence, especially now that they were alone in his apartment.

“So, uh, what brings you to New York?” Blaine asked.

“Are we going to have a cosy catch up or are we going to pick up where we left off, because I–” He was interrupted by Blaine’s lips slamming onto his. Kurt grinned into the kiss and slid his hands down Blaine’s back, squeezing his ass and making the other boy moan.

“You got a bed somewhere?” Kurt asked, his voice quiet.

Blaine led the way, shedding layers of clothing as he went. They were down to their pants by the time they got to Blaine’s bedroom and he pushed the other man into the wall, pressing their bodies together.

*

Santana knocked on Blaine’s door at 8am sharp, and kept knocking until she heard him stir inside. It took him a few minutes, but he finally opened the door wearing only a pair of sweatpants.

“Got my money yet, Anderson?” she asked, straight to the point.

“Shit,” Blaine cringed. It seemed Kurt had distracted him and he had forgotten to split up the money.

“You slept with Kurt instead?” she assumed, taking in the clothes on his floor and his hickeys – one each on his neck, chest and hip.

“Make yourself some breakfast and I’ll do it now,” he said in reply, pulling the bag out from under the couch.

“So he’s your ex-boyfriend, that’s how you know him?” She found some yoghurt in his fridge and spoon in the top drawer.

“It’s a little more complicated than that.” His voice sounded strained, he was obviously uncomfortable talking about his history with the mysterious Kurt.

“Fine,” she sighed, then licked her spoon thoughtfully. “But you need to help me get laid. Nick and Jeff always fuck like rabbits and now you’re getting laid, it’s time I got some too.”

“He’s gone now, I don’t think he’ll be back for a while – if he comes back at all,” Blaine said, splitting the money into even stacks. She couldn’t tell if he was disappointed or not. “But a night out wouldn’t hurt.”


	2. Four Months, Two Weeks and Three Days since Blaine has seen Kurt

Four Months, Two Weeks and Three Days since Blaine has seen Kurt (not that he was counting…)

“Why do I always get paired up with Santana for these things?” Jeff whined.

“At least you’re not the bartender,” Nick grumbled.

“At least you’re not pretending to be straight,” Blaine added.

“Why are we running this con again?”

“Because if me or Santana can get account information from them, we can get at least four million dollars in 5 minutes,” Blaine reminded his team.

“Or if we find anything useful in the safe upstairs we can get it faster,” Santana added.

They hadn’t pulled any big cons or heists since the run-in with Kurt, but they had been working on this one since then. Blaine and Santana had been able to strike up relationships with a pair of very wealthy business partners – Marley Rose and Kitty Wilde of Wilde Rose Insurance – who were known to rip their clients off.  They hoped that as their relationships progressed they would be able to find an account number to make a transfer. Knowing that this could go on for quite a while without results, they had developed a back-up plan. Santana had noticed a safe hidden behind a painting in an upstairs hallway, so if Nick and Jeff could find anything useful in there, the plan could be implemented faster.

“I can see Kitty, don’t screw this up boys,” Santana warned them, grinning at the blonde she was approaching.

“I’m going to go find Marley then,” Blaine said. “Wait at least half an hour before you go upstairs.”

Blaine followed after Santana and found Marley talking to a tall blonde man and Kurt. He nearly did a double take when he saw Kurt for the second time in 4 months, but composed himself to greet his girlfriend.

“James,” she greeted him with a huge smile. “You look fantastic.” Blaine didn’t miss the way Kurt looked longingly at him before regaining his composure.

“So do you, as always,” he smiled back.

“James, this is Adam Crawford and Kurt Hummel from the FBI,” she informed him.

“James Bennett,” Blaine introduced himself with the alias he was using on this con, keeping his voice steady despite his rising heart rate. His heart was hammering in his chest – whether it was from the risk of an FBI agent being at the sight of this con or from seeing Kurt again he couldn’t tell.

 “We received information that someone was planning to scam the Wilde Rose company and we thought we’d come check it out for ourselves,” Adam explained.

“Well we’re in good hands with you here,” Blaine said with his winning smile. “I’m going to get a drink, do you want anything, Marley?”

“I just got one, thanks though.”

“Did you hear that, Nick?” Blaine asked into the comms once he was out of earshot.

“Yeah, Feds are here,” he replied unhappily, then continued when Blaine got to the bar. “Do Jeff and I keep going with our part of this or should we postpone it?”

Blaine tapped his fingers on the bar, thinking. “If I can keep Kurt and the Agent distracted and in my sight while you’re upstairs, I think we can do it.”

“Wait, the same Kurt from the other heist? He’s with the FBI?” Nick asked, pouring a drink for the woman down from Blaine.

“I don’t know,” Blaine said miserably. “But they’re talking to Marley, and if you and Jeff can be prepared for FBI agents as well as the security then we can do this. Anything to get this over faster.”

“Your drink, sir,” Nick said with a wink, placing Blaine’s glass in front of him.

Kurt and the other FBI agent were still talking to Marley when he got back, and Kurt excused himself to have a private word with Blaine.

“You two know each other?” Adam raised his eyebrows at them.

“We go way back,” Kurt grinned, making Blaine panic. Was Kurt seriously going to blow his cover? “We were show choir rivals in high school.” That little shit just wanted to watch Blaine squirm.

“Are you seriously an FBI agent?” Blaine asked under his breath as they moved away from the crowd.

“I’m a consultant.” Blaine raised his eyebrow. “I’m on a work release from prison. I got caught a few years ago on an art forgery and struck up a deal with Adam. Tracking anklet and everything.”

“You weren’t wearing it four months ago,” Blaine recalled.

“Every now and then an undercover case is deemed too risky for me to wear it. You caught me on one of those days.”

“You were tipped off about us and the vault that day?” Kurt nodded. “But you didn’t say anything to your handler?” He nodded again. “Why not?”

“I wouldn’t want you to be alone in prison without me,” he answered with a smirk. “Having fun playing straight with Marley, James?”

“It’ll be worth it when this pays off,” Blaine shrugged.

They could faintly hear an alarm from upstairs. “Is that you?”

“If it is, will you keep quiet?”

“Yes.”

“Then yes, Nick and Jeff just set that alarm off.”

oOo

Nick had slipped away from the bar, leaving the other bartender to look after it while he was upstairs. Jeff met him at the foot of the stairs and they looked at the oak door marked ‘Private’.

“I love it when we get to do this,” Jeff grinned before pushing his boyfriend against the door, pressing their lips together and triggering the alarm set on the door.

Jeff slipped a hand down the back of Nick’s pants – for authenticity of course – and Nick made a satisfied sound into his boyfriend’s mouth. Nick’s hands tangled in Jeff’s hair and they continued to make out passionately until the security guards and FBI agent came running to the door. They pulled apart and played embarrassed until a guard reset the alarm and they were able to slip upstairs.

“I’m getting you back for that when we get home,” Nick warned him in a whisper.

“I look forward to it,” Jeff grinned.

oOo

“So James, what do you do for a living?” Adam asked Blaine as they were sat around a table with Kurt and Marley. Kitty and Santana seemed to have disappeared off to a side room, and Blaine wanted to keep Agent Crawford in his sight.

“I’m a freelance writer,” he answered. “Look out for me in the Times and hopefully I’ll get published soon.”

“He sounds like quite a catch, Marley,” Kurt smiled.

“I’m a very lucky girl to have a man like James,” she nodded.

“Did I hear an alarm go off earlier, Adam?” Kurt asked his partner.

“It was an accident,” Adam explained. “Two guys knocked a door open in the middle of making out.”

“I’m surprised it wasn’t Kitty and Sara,” Marley said, using the name Santana had chosen as her alias. “They always seem to disappear during these parties.”

“I’m surprised they can stay off each other long enough to see any guests,” Blaine laughed.

“We’re done upstairs,” Jeff informed him into the comms.

“If you’ll excuse me, I have to use the little boy’s room,” Blaine said, leaving the table and walking out of the room. Out of the corner of his eye he noticed Santana doing the same thing on the other side of the room. Once he was out of sight and earshot, he spoke into the comms, “did you find anything?”

“There were a few documents that we took photos of, but nothing else,” Nick informed him.

“Nothing at all?”

“Some mundane jewellery, nothing worth taking,” Jeff said.

“Do you think the documents will tell us anything?” Santana asked.

“Unlikely,” Nick said glumly, “but possibly,”

“Dammit,” Blaine swore.

“We’ve put way too much time into this to call it off now,” Santana said. “Blaine, you’re going to have to talk to Kurt and find out what the FBI knows. We’ve done nothing to make them suspicious of us. If anything, I’m suspicious of them. Why do they keep showing up where we’re pulling something?”

Blaine sighed and ran his hands through his hair tiredly. “Fine, I’ll try to talk to him.”

“Are you sure we can trust him?” Jeff asked. “You’ve been very vague about how you know him.”

“If I trust anyone, it’s Kurt,” Blaine assured them. “And if you trust me, then you’ll trust him too.”

“I can for now, but I want some answers soon, Blaine,” Jeff said.

“Let’s just focus on tonight first, okay?” Blaine prioritised.

“Blaine and I are going to go back into the party and make small talk with our dates,” Santana instructed. “Nick, you’re going to finish your shift as the bartender. Jeff, you’re going to go home and start looking through the pictures of the documents to see if there’s anything useful in them. After that, Blaine is going to talk to Kurt and see what the FBI knows about all of this and we’ll see what happens from there.”

“When we pull this off, I am going to take a very long holiday and I will not return to this city until I can be assured that no one will try to rope me into another con this risky,” Nick said, exhaling deeply to let out his frustration. “And next time, someone else gets to be the bartender. I can’t take handling all this alcohol and not being able to drink it.”

“I’ll buy you a whole liquor store when we get the money,” Blaine said with forced patience. “I’m going to go back inside now and pretend everything’s fine. I suggest you all do the same.”

oOo

After an hour Blaine gave Marley a kiss goodbye, claiming he had to be up early to write and couldn’t stay over. He had managed to slip another note in Kurt’s pocket, asking him to come over as soon as he could.

Santana followed him outside, fixing her dress as she was walking. “Would it be weird for me to keep sleeping with Kitty after we steal all of their money?”

“Probably,” Blaine answered, hailing a cab.

“Did you manage to talk to Kurt?”

“I told him to come over, I couldn’t risk saying anything there.”

“And you wanted to repeat what happened last time?” she guessed with a smirk.

Blaine ignored her, and they sat in silence until they got to his apartment building. Jeff was inside when they unlocked the door to Blaine’s flat, hunched over a computer in the study off the side of the living room.

“Find anything yet?” Santana asked.

“Not yet, but there must be something worthwhile if they were keeping it in a safe,” he replied without looking up from the screen. “Do you know how long Nick’ll be?”

“Probably no more than half an hour,” Blaine guessed and Jeff nodded.

Santana raided his fridge as Blaine flopped down onto the couch, massaging his temples before untying his bowtie and undoing his top buttons.

“So, you really like Kitty?” Blaine asked Santana as she sat beside him on the couch with a container of leftover Chinese food.

“She’s fun,” she shrugged, “and pretty good in bed. It’s nice to be able to rely on that.”

“I envy you, Marley’s alright but…”

“We’re not having this argument again, Blaine,” Santana warned him. “We have agreed to disagree about the attractiveness of girls, remember?”

“Fine,” he sighed, rolling his head onto her shoulder. They had all become closer over the months of constantly working together. Of course they all still had their secrets, but they were almost like a family now. They knew each other better than anyone else, able to read the subtle nuances of each other’s body language and able to tell when they were hiding something by the slightest change in their voices.

It took another 25 minutes for Nick to arrive, Jeff greeting him with a kiss. They had been together for as long as Blaine had known them and for all that time they had a routine whenever they were separated. For at least 2 minutes they would hold each other in silence when they were reunited, simply to reassure each other that they were both safe.

Nick had just taken over from Jeff on the computer when there was another knock on the door. Nick minimised the screen as Blaine answered the door.

“I think we have a little explaining to do,” Kurt said, leaning against the doorway and still in his tuxedo. “Your crew seem mightily confused.”

“We are!” Jeff called out.

“Fine,” Blaine sighed and stepped back from the door

“So what’s the deal with you two, did you date or what?” Santana asked.

“Well–”

“We were cellmates in juvie,” Kurt answered.

“I thought we were going to–” Blaine objected.

“You went to juvie, Blaine?” Nick was clearly surprised.

“What did you get caught doing?” Jeff was equally shocked.

“I was charged with assault and battery – it was revenge,” Blaine explained. “Kurt helped me survive in there.”

“That’s not all I did,” he said with a wink.

“I knew it!” Santana shouted. “You were prison fuck buddies, this is fantastic.”

“Juvie, not prison,” Blaine clarified. “My file has been sealed and I’ve never been charged with anything else.”

“All the same, I was disappointed when you left.”

“Can we focus on the present rather than the past now, please?” Blaine pleaded. “Kurt, we need to know what the FBI knows about this case.”

“And why should I tell you?” he raised an eyebrow. “For all you know, I’m a completely reformed and law-abiding citizen now.”

“You didn’t say anything when you saw us on the heist,” Blaine said. “And I’m sure I can find something else to hang over your head, we were in juvie together for a while… do the Feds even know you were in there?”

“You said it before, once we turn 18 our files are sealed.”

“So will you help us?”

“The FBI doesn’t know much,” Kurt sighed. “We got an anonymous tip-off that Wilde Rose Insurance was going to be scammed. We looked into it and couldn’t find anything suspicious, but Adam thought we should go to this party and check it out anyway.”

“And what did he think?” Jeff prompted.

“He was a little concerned when the alarm went off, but I don’t think he’s too worried,” Kurt explained.

“What’s it going to take for you to keep quiet about this and let us pull it off quietly?” Nick asked.

“Oh, it’s a great plan and Blaine and I have a lot of history, I have no intention of telling Adam anything,” Kurt grinned. “I wouldn’t mind a word with Blaine, though.”

“Do you really trust him, Blaine?” Nick asked.

“I would trust him with my life,” Blaine nodded.

Nick sighed, standing up before speaking, “I suppose Jeff and I should get going and leave you alone then.”

“We’ll take the photos with us and go through them at home,” Jeff said, following his boyfriend out.

“Well, as much as I’d love to stay and watch, I should probably give you two a bit of privacy,” Santana smirked, winking at Kurt before following the other boys out.

It took all of Blaine’s willpower not to wrap himself around Kurt now that they were alone. It had been four months since they last saw each other and 8 years since they shared their cell in juvie, but the attraction was definitely still be there. Blaine had been 15 at the time of his first arrest and Kurt 16. Kurt had been in for a few months before Blaine was sentenced and he had been too scared to keep in contact to find out how long Kurt had left once Blaine got out.

“Your friends seem nice,” Kurt said.

“Are we gonna chit-chat or are we going to pick up where we left off?” Blaine asked, noticing Kurt’s eyes watching his mouth.

“We can’t avoid talking forever.”

“Not avoiding, just postponing,” Blaine insisted, pressing his mouth to Kurt’s.

With Blaine’s mouth on his, Kurt’s mind kicked into gear. His hands went to Blaine’s shirt, unbuttoning it before removing his jacket and moving to his pants.

Kurt laughed when he saw what was under Blaine’s jacket. “Suspenders? Really, Blaine?”

“Shut up,” Blaine pouted, unclipping them and allowing his pants to drop to the floor. Kurt followed suit, and they both knew that they wouldn’t get much talking done that night.

oOo

It was still dark outside when Blaine woke. As he blinked his eyes open he realised there was a warm body pressed against his side. Kurt. Blaine felt him shift in his sleep and a leg wrapped over his, the cool, hard plastic of his tracking anklet pressed against his skin.

As he lay there, his mind raced, and he was unable to sleep or move until his bladder decided it needed emptying. He tried to be as quiet as possible, but Kurt was awake and sitting on the edge of his bed when he got back.

“I missed you,” Blaine admitted, sitting down beside the other man and staring at the floor.

“Prison sucked without you,” Kurt looked at the man beside him, still partly seeing the cell-mate he had fallen for in juvie. “I missed you too.”

“My crew doesn’t like you,” Blaine said.

“Your friends don’t like that they don’t know who I am.”

“Well they know now,” Blaine sighed. “You told them we were in juvie together.”

“That’s a minor detail, they don’t know what happened in there,” Kurt said.

“We fell in love.”

“I should go,” Kurt stood up abruptly. “Adam might get suspicious if I’m not home in the morning and I don’t want to blow your cover on this con.”

“You’re not going to say anything to him?”

“I’m disappointed you think I would, Blaine.”

oOo

Nick called Blaine bearing good news the next morning. He explained to Blaine that they had found account information they could use, but without the password it would take weeks to hack. Nick left Blaine to update Santana, and he called her the moment he disconnected with Nick.

 “ _This better be good Anderson_ ,” Santana huffed through the line.

“Nick found account information in the photos they took last night,” Blaine informed her.

“ _I feel a ‘but’ coming up, you don’t sound excited enough_.”

“Without a password it’s going to take time before we can access it,” he said.

 “ _He found their account number but it’s useless without a password_?” Blaine could hear in her voice that she was formulating a plan as she spoke.

“Yeah.”

“ _It’s useless unless we know the answers to their security questions, then we can get access without the password_.”

“I’ll get Nick to find out the questions and text them to you, you need to get the answers off Kitty,” Blaine ordered.

“ _I’ll go see her now then_ ,” Santana said, ending the call.

oOo

“Sara?” Kitty answered the door, her eyebrows slightly scrunched in confusion. “I wasn’t expecting to see you until later.”

“I was bored and I missed you,” Santana shrugged, kissing her softly on the lips.

“I’m not complaining then,” Kitty smirked.

Santana pulled out her phone as Kitty led her inside, reading the text she just received from Nick: “ _First film she saw in the cinema. Name of her oldest sibling. The last 5 digits of her credit card number._ ”

“Something important?” Kitty asked.

“No, it’s just James,” Santana lied, pocketing her phone.

“Good,” Kitty smiled. “So what do you want to do today?”

“We could watch a movie?” Santana suggested. “Do you have Jumanji? I’m feeling nostalgic, it was the first movie I went to see when I was little.”

“I hated that movie, I couldn’t look under my bed for weeks after watching it,” she laughed, sitting down onto the couch. “My first movie was Toy Story, much less scary.”

“Can’t go wrong with a good Disney movie. How about you get pay-per view up and we pick a new-release?”

“Sounds perfect,” Kitty said, relaxing into Santana’s side.

Santana replied to Nick’s text as Kitty was flicking through the movies on the screen, thankful that their first date had been interrupted by a call from Kitty’s sister: “ _Film- Toy Story. Oldest sibling- Dani. Credit card number is in our file on her, get it off Blaine._ ”

A reply came in moments later: “ _Thanks! Remember to play dumb if she gets told the money’s gone._ ”

“You’re sure it’s nothing important?” Kitty asked, concerned.

“Yeah, James just won’t shut up,” Santana laughed, pocketing her phone once again.

They made it halfway into the movie before Adam called Kitty, and she moved into the hallway to answer it.

Santana could only hear snippets of Kitty’s side of the conversation, but from what she could tell the boys had been able to make the transfer. She breathed an immense sigh of relief before taking up a concerned-girlfriend face.

“Who was that?” she asked.

“It was Adam Crawford from the FBI,” Kitty said slowly, still processing the information as she sat back down. “He told me that someone has stolen four million dollars from Wilde Rose Insurance. “

“Are they trying to do anything to get the money back?” Santana asked, knowing very well that between the four of them, there was no way the FBI would be finding that money.

“He said that they would try, but it would be unlikely they could trace it,” Kitty sighed. “Adam seemed pretty impressed by whoever did it.”

“Do you need to go into the office? I should get out of your way.”

“Thanks, Sara,” she said, both of them standing up. They shared a quick and distracted kiss before Santana squeezed her hand and left.

OoO

“I’m a terrible person,” Santana said, collapsing onto Blaine’s couch the following Friday.

“Aren’t we all?” Blaine asked. To him, it was a legitimate question, his head tilted in confusion.

“Kitty’s been devastated all week and I have no choice but to lie to her,” Santana sighed, her actions from the weekend before still weighing on her. “How long do I need to wait before I can dump her and still avoid suspicion?”

“This is why I hate doing cons with romantic involvement. It’s so much harder to cut the ties.”

“We need to get drunk tonight,” Santana proposed. “I doubt Nick’s going to say no to booze which means Jeff will come too, but you have to bring Kurt.”

“Is drinking really going to help?”

“Probably not by itself but when have dancing and loud music not helped?” Santana shrugged. “If I remember correctly that’s all you wanted to do after lighthouse boy dumped you.”

“That was different, Eli wasn’t a mark and we weren’t conning him,” Blaine argued.

“Regardless, we’re celebrating the end of this con tonight,” Santana decided.

“Maybe I should get out of the city for a while now that this is over,” Blaine said, his eyes glazed over slightly. “Italy sounds nice, doesn’t it?”

“It really does,” she nodded. “But we’re still going out tonight.”

oOo

“Does he always drink so much?” Kurt asked Jeff, both of them watching Nick down yet another shot. The bar in front of him was littered with empty glasses and the bartender was beginning to eye him warily.

“It’s been a long few months for all of us,” Jeff shrugged. “We all have to let loose somehow. And Blaine promised to buy him a liquor store, so I think he’s paying tonight.”

“Even though it was Santana’s idea to go out?”

Jeff just shrugged in response, his eyes fixed on his boyfriend. “Maybe if I make him dance with me he won’t give himself alcohol poisoning.”

“Good luck with that,” Kurt smiled sadly.

“You should pull Blaine onto the dance floor,” Jeff said. “He’ll protest at first but there’s nothing he loves more.”

“Thanks,” Kurt nodded. He watched as Jeff approached his boyfriend at the bar, bending down to kiss the bottom of Nick’s jaw. Kurt saw them share a few words before Nick stood up – only somewhat unsteadily – and they moved out onto the nearly empty dance floor.

He hadn’t been sitting alone for long before Santana took Jeff’s recently vacated seat. “I’m glad Blaine managed to convince you to come out with us,” she grinned.

“It didn’t take much convincing,” Kurt laughed. “But he’s spent most of the night sitting over there alone.” He pointed to where Blaine was sitting with a line of empty glasses next to him.

“Then go over to him,” Santana nudged him. “He’s been pining over you for ages now, and he’s the one that invited you here.”

“Fine,” he nodded, standing up.

“Great, because the bartender is insanely pretty and I think I’m getting panic sweat under my boobs.”

“Go talk to her,” Kurt laughed. Santana took a deep breath before taking Kurt’s advice, and he followed hers, taking the seat next to Blaine at the bar.

“Is this seat taken?” he asked, needing to half-shout to be heard over the music.

“Sorry, I don’t like to associate with convicted felons. It ruins my reputation,” Blaine smirked.

“It didn’t seem to worry you last weekend,” Kurt bantered. “I’d even wager that the tracking anklet turned you on even more.”

“You would win that bet,” he laughed before sighing, his head dropping onto Kurt’s shoulder.  “I’m so, so glad this stupid con is over. Not impressed the feds were on our tail, but at least we got our money.”

“Do you have any plans for it?”

“Travelling, I think. I won’t tell you where – plausible deniability and all of that.”

“How considerate,” Kurt rolled his eyes. “Jeff told me I should drag you onto the dance floor against your will.”

“I think I’d rather just sit here,” Blaine pouted.

“Hence the ‘against your will’ part,” he grabbed Blaine’s hand. “Let’s have our first dance together, Blaine.”

“If you insist,” Blaine obliged, allowing Kurt to lead him over to the small crowd of people on the dance floor.

They danced together, as close together as they could be without being obscene, for several songs, letting the music and the feel of each other’s skin drown out all other thoughts. When Blaine went to get them both another drink he noticed someone vaguely familiar sitting down from him at the bar, and it wasn’t until the man spoke that he recognised him.

“Hey killer,” the man smirked.

“Sebastian,” Blaine sighed. “I’d say it’s good to see you but you’ve always been able to tell when I’m lying.”

“I’m sure your poker face has improved a lot since we last spoke, how else would you have been able to pull off all those cons and heists I keep hearing about?”

“I mustn’t be that good if you’re hearing about them,” Blaine rolled his eyes.

“People have nothing but praise for you, Blaine. You could easily assemble a better crew than the one you’ve got here,” Sebastian gestured to Nick and Jeff, then to Santana who seemed to be flirting with the blonde girl tending the bar.

“Let’s agree to disagree,” Blaine said, barely masking a grimace.

“Of course, you never know who’s going to _expose_ you.”

“Still bitter?” Blaine smirked. The other man merely scowled in response. “If you’ll excuse me, I should get back to my friends.” Blaine stood up, picking up his and Kurt’s drinks, and turned away from the bar.

“It was good seeing you again, Blaine,” Sebastian said in parting.

“Goodbye, Sebastian.”

Blaine chose not to dwell on the encounter, returning all of his attention to Kurt.

“You took your time,” Kurt observed, taking his drink.

“I ran into an old friend, no one important,” he explained. “Let’s dance again.”

“Or,” Kurt smirked, “We could go back to your place.”

“Won’t Adam get suspicious if you’re spending so much time there?”

“I’ll just slip away before he gets up to check,” Kurt shrugged.

“Well in that case…” Blaine gulped down the rest of his drink. “Let’s go.”

OoO

“What are we doing here so bloody early on a Saturday morning?” Adam asked, taking a seat at the table in the briefing room.

“There was an art theft at a museum last night and they want us on it as soon as possible,” Agent Quinn Fabray explained.

“Any suspects?” Adam asked. “Was there any evidence left behind?”

“We found fingerprints,” Quinn informed him. “We got a match when we ran them in the system – Blaine Anderson was the name. Twenty-three years old, no priors but he’s been suspected of everything from theft to forgery. His description matches what we could make out from the only security camera footage that was left.”

“That’s enough for a warrant isn’t it?” Adam asked. “Could you find an address of residence?”

“We had trouble, there’s not much on him,” Quinn passed him the file. “But we looked into his bank transaction records and last month he paid rent for an apartment here in New York. We’ve got a team over there now to bring him in.”

“Get Hummel over here, we need him on this,” Adam ordered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There should only be one more part after this, but it could be a while before it's finished so bear with me and I'd love any feedback or comments


	3. 5 hours since Blaine has seen Kurt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was hoping this would only be 3 parts but it looks like there'll be at least one more after this, sorry for the wait!   
> (A lot of this chapter was heavily inspired by the TV show Revenge, so bonus points to anyone who recognises which bits I 'borrowed' from there)

Blaine expected it to be one of his crew, a neighbour or even Kurt when he heard the knock at the door. The last thing he expected was a team of FBI agents coming to place him under arrest.

His first confusion was how they had found him when he had used another name to rent this apartment, but then he remembered that last month he had to pay the rent with his personal bank account – the ‘Blaine Anderson’ one.

The next thing he was confused about was what they were actually arresting him for. The Feds had mentioned something about a theft, had Kurt betrayed him after all and told his partner about what he had done? Or was Nick not as careful as he thought he was when transferring the money?

After he had his rights read to him, he was taken to the FBI headquarters and handcuffed to a table in an interrogation room. He sat waiting patiently for an agent to come and question him, and he was mildly surprised when Agent Crawford entered the room.

Blaine didn’t miss the look of confusion on the agent’s face when he recognised Blaine – or ‘James Bennet’ as Adam had met him as the week before.

“I take it James isn’t your real name then?” Adam asked him, sitting down on the other side of the table. Blaine remained silent, and Adam continued. “We have evidence that places you at the scene of an art museum theft last night. A painting was stolen and your prints are on the wall behind where the frame sat. Most of the security cameras were taken out but we saw a figure that matched your description leave the building. Where were you between midnight and 5am last night?” Apparently Kurt hadn’t sold him out. He had been framed instead.

“I was at home,” Blaine said evenly.

“Do you have someone who can confirm that statement?”

“Oh, you’re going to love this,” he grinned. “I was with Kurt Hummel last night. Check his tracking data to prove it if you must.”

Agent Crawford spoke into the microphone on the table, “Get Hummel up here and someone bring me his tracking data for last night.”

Blaine sat silently, smirking slightly, as the agent opposite him comprehended this new information.

“We still have your fingerprints at the scene of this crime,” Adam explained. “This is more than circumstantial evidence and we’re going to have to investigate further if your alibi proves to be true.”

They waited in silence until Kurt entered the room, holding a tablet computer that he handed to his partner.

“Kurt, we have evidence that places this man at the scene of a crime but he maintains that he was with you between midnight and 5am last night when it happened. Can you confirm this statement?”

“I can,” Kurt nodded. “I spent last night with Blaine.”

“What were the two of you doing together?” Adam asked.

Blaine grinned and Kurt blushed slightly before saying, “do you really want to know?”

Sighing, Adam shook his head. “How long have you two known each other?”

“We met nine years ago,” Blaine answered.

“We spent almost a year together when I was 16 and I hadn’t heard from him again until a few months ago,” Kurt added.

“So we’ve proven my alibi is accurate, now you just need to work out whether the prints were planted or not unless you have any more questions for me,” Blaine stated.

“I’ve seen your file and you’re suspected of doing a lot of things, Anderson,” Adam said. “It could save you a lot of jail time later if you confess.”

“I have only been charged with this art theft and that’s the only thing I’m going to answer questions about today.”

“Fine.” Adam stood up from the table. “Kurt, we need to have a talk outside.” Kurt followed his partner outside and Blaine winked at him.

“You really know this guy?” Adam asked him.

“I told you, we met when I was 16,” Kurt answered.

“So you recognised him at the party and didn’t feel like mentioning that he was using an alias? That could be crucial to the investigation about Wilde Rose Insurance.”

“It’s been 8 years, he could have legally changed his name for all I knew. I didn’t want to bring attention to it,” Kurt defended himself.

“So you didn’t know about it when you were out last night?”

“What are you talking about?”

“A photo was sent to my computer this morning of the two of you at a club, and your tracking data shows you were there last night – a few hours before the theft is believed to have taken place,” Adam explained.

“Fine, I knew his name wasn’t James,” Kurt admitted. It was no use lying about that to Adam. “But I didn’t think it would be important.”

Adam sighed and ran a hand down his face. “There’s something you’re not telling me, I can feel it.”

“You’re just not asking the right questions,” Kurt smirked. “I was with him all night last night. He was at home when he said he was last night, you’ve got my word and my tracking data for proof. You have to let him go until you can find evidence to hold him."

oOo      

Blaine pulled out his phone the second he stepped into the sun outside the FBI headquarters, rubbing his wrists from where the cuffs had dug in.

“Jeff, I need you to spread the word that whoever it was that framed me needs to stop before this gets messy.”

“ _Wait, framed you? What’s going on Blaine_?” Jeff asked, panic and confusion clear in his voice.

“The feds showed up this morning and arrested me for an art theft that happened last night,” Blaine explained. “Kurt confirmed my alibi so they let me go but my prints were at the scene. Someone framed me and I think it’s the same person that tipped off the feds about our scam on Marley and Kitty. They– whoever it was also sent a photo of me and Kurt from last night to Adam, so I need Nick to trace it when he’s awake.”

“ _I’ll get him to call you when he wakes up_ ,” Jeff responded. “ _And_ _I’ll spread the word to see if anyone’s heard anything._ ” Jeff paused and Blaine knew exactly what he was about to ask. “ _You don’t think it could be Kurt, do you? I know you said–_ ”

“Kurt was with me all night last night. Even if he wasn’t, I know he wouldn’t do it. Please just trust me about him.”

Jeff’s sigh crackled through the line. “ _Fine, I’ll spread the word around. See you, Blaine._ ”

When Jeff ended the call, Blaine immediately dialled Santana’s number.

Santana’s phone rang several times before someone answered, “ _Hello?_ ” It was a cheerful female voice that Blaine didn’t recognise.

“Uh, hi,” he began warily. “Is Santana there?”

“ _She’s in the shower at the moment_ ,” the girl answered. “ _Do you want me to get her to call you back?_ ”

“Yeah, tell her Blaine called,” he instructed. “And that she needs to call me back – she’ll probably say that it doesn’t matter, but I really need her to call me back or come over.”

“ _I’ll pass the message on_ ,” she promised.

“Thanks,” he replied, ending the call.

OoO

Nick was prone to sleeping all day when he was hung over so it was no surprise that Jeff was able to slip back into bed after his phone call with Blaine and catch a few more hours of sleep himself.

He woke up for the second time that morning in his favourite way – warm, naked and with Nick pressed against his side. He felt his boyfriend stir beside him and rolled over to rouse him with a kiss.

“Why is it so bright?” Nick grumbled, his eyes squinted against the sunlight streaming in from the gaps in the curtains.

“Because you had a lot of fun last night and your body hates you for it,” Jeff replied, used to dealing with him like this. “What do you want for breakfast?”

“You’re perfect, you know that?” Nick smiled, watching his boyfriend rummage through a drawer to find clean underwear.

“Love you too,” Jeff laughed, throwing underwear at Nick before searching for where he left his phone. He found Nick’s before his own and tossed it to him. “Blaine wants you to call him when you’re awake.”

“He can wait,” Nick said, knowing very well that he shouldn’t keep Blaine waiting. He walked over to the ensuite bathroom and leaned against the doorjamb, still butt naked. “Join me in the shower?”

It was an offer too good for Jeff to refuse.

An hour later – after they had finally decided that no, Nick would never stop giving Jeff shampoo Mohawks when they showered together – Nick remembered to call Blaine back.

Blaine picked up after a few rings and outlined what Nick needed to know. Nick reluctantly agreed to trace the email, hoping it might lead him to whoever had tipped the FBI off about their other escapades.

“I suppose the photo of Kurt proves that it really wasn’t him,” Jeff sighed, settling down next to Nick on the couch as he set up his laptop for the afternoon of work.

“Not necessarily,” Nick leant his head against his boyfriend’s arm. “It could be a decoy or something. I don’t want to overthink this but I’m not making any assumptions until I can track the origin of the email.”

“So you don’t trust Kurt?”

“I don’t know. I trust Blaine and if he trusts Kurt then I suppose I have to as well. He knows enough to put us all away for a long time and he hasn’t said anything yet, I suppose we just have to believe that he’ll stay that way.”

“Would you ever sell me out?” Jeff asked.

“What? Of course not,” Nick said, pressing a kiss to Jeff’s forehead.

“Then Kurt won’t sell Blaine out.”

“Wait, you think–”

“You haven’t noticed the way they look at each other? There’s definitely something going on between them, and while they’re madly in love we are safe.”

Nick was slightly surprised by that, but he believed it nonetheless. He spent the next few hours on his laptop – whoever had sent the email was good, but Nick was better. He triumphantly called Jeff back over when he managed to identify the sender but Jeff, like Nick, had never heard of him.

Once they had a name, it wasn’t hard for Nick to find more information on the man, searching every data base he could to assemble an understanding of who they were dealing with and what motives he may have.

Blaine called again to check on their progress as Nick was printing out what he had found, and they planned to convene at Blaine’s for a team meeting when they were finished.

Kurt was already there when they arrived, seemingly having come straight from work, and Santana joined them not long after.

“What did you find, Nick?” Kurt asked, barely hidden desperation in his voice.

“The guy that sent the email tried to cover his tracks, but I managed to find out his name – Sebastian Smythe,” Nick began, opening the folder of paper he had printed.

“Really?” Blaine asked, surprised.

“You know him?” Nick looked up from the paper.

“He’s…” Blaine exhaled in a huff. “Sebastian tried to pull a con on my Dad’s business a while back – before my father completely gave up on me and back when we actually spoke.”

“Wait, tried to?” Jeff asked.

“I stopped him before he could pull it off, and now I guess he’s after revenge or something.”

“How did you stop him if he’s never been arrested? There was nothing in his file when I looked him up,” Nick said, eyebrows slightly creased in confusion.

“Well, I–” Blaine looked around awkwardly, a blush creeping up his neck. “I didn’t have any proof to take it to the police or anything so I convinced my father to fire him. I just didn’t tell him what Sebastian was up to – the specifics of what happened don’t matter.”

“Why are you blushing?” Santana observed. “What did you do back then Blaine?”

“It doesn’t matter–”

“Keeping things from us doesn’t help anything, Blaine,” Nick reasoned.

“The only way to get my Dad to fire Sebastian was for him to see Sebastian as an unfit employee. The only way I could think of to do that quickly was for my Dad had to see a sex tape of Sebastian… and me,” Blaine said, staring at the floor. “We had already slept together once, before I knew what he was doing, so it wasn’t hard to convince him I wanted to sleep with him again, and I recorded it.”

“A sex tape?” Santana looked like Christmas had come early.

“You showed it to your Dad?” Jeff seemed to be questioning Blaine’s sanity.

“I emailed it to him anonymously,” he explained. “It was the last thing I wanted to do but I had to stop Sebastian. Of course my father only saw it as concrete proof I was actually gay and proceeded to kick me out of his life, but at least he’s not bankrupt or in jail.”

“That was when we first met, wasn’t it? You asked me to encrypt a file so it would be untraceable, and you made me promise I wouldn’t watch it,” Nick said, suddenly remembering. “That was the video of you and Sebastian?”

“Yeah, it was,” Blaine nodded.

“Well that explains why Sebastian’s after you,” Kurt reasoned.

“It makes sense for him to be the one who tipped off the FBI about that heist and the Wilde Rose thing too,” Blaine nodded.

“But it doesn’t explain how he knew in the first place,” Jeff added.

“He’s smart and word gets around, it wouldn’t have been that hard for someone to overhear something or let something slip,” Blaine suggested.

“If he had anything concrete, none of us would be here,” Kurt said. “The tips the FBI got sent seemed like nothing more than hunches. If he was desperate enough to try to frame Blaine, then we know he doesn’t actually have anything on us.”

“So he’s not actually a threat?” Jeff asked.

“Potentially,” Blaine sighed. “But I’m going to talk to him. Nick, did you find anything he wouldn’t want us to know?”

“You want to blackmail him?” Nick raised a sceptical eyebrow.

“I want him to leave us alone.”

“By blackmailing him?”

“Fine, I want to confront him and if I need to, I will blackmail him,” Blaine said, exasperated.

“There wasn’t much out of the ordinary, just school and employment records mostly. A few outstanding warrants for minor crimes.” Nick flicked back through the papers. “I could look closer into his social media if you want though – people overestimate the security of ‘private’ facebook messages.”

“You’re a lifesaver, Nick,” Blaine smiled, passing Nick a tablet computer and leaning back in his chair.

OoO

“You owe me so much, Blaine Devon Anderson,” Nick growled, turning the tablet around to let Blaine read the screen. “If I have to see Senator Clarington’s dick one more time, I’m going to burn my eyes out.”

“I take it you found something then?”

“It seems Senator Clarington is not as faithful to his wife as one would expect,” Nick began seriously before finishing with a smirk, “he’s having an affair with Sebastian.”

“Why do we think Sebastian will care about us outing his boyfriend?” Santana asked.

“If he gets thrown into the spotlight it could derail whatever plans he has. And media attention could potentially get him taken in for his outstanding warrants,” Kurt explained. “That’s all without assuming that he actually cares about Clarington and will want to protect him.”

“But we’re only going to threaten Sebastian, right? Because we know that outing people is a really shitty thing to do,” Nick clarified.

“Of course,” Blaine nodded. “Thank you, Nick. We couldn’t do any of this without you.” Nick accepted the praise with a nod as Blaine began scrolling through the tablet, grimacing whenever he came across some of the more graphic pictures in the conversation.

When he seemed satisfied, Blaine set the tablet down and addressed the group, “I’m going to meet with Sebastian and try to compromise with him. If everything goes to plan we will finally be able to put all of this to rest within the week. I couldn’t have asked for any better people to work with.”

“You’re not so bad yourself, Anderson,” Santana said, making the group laugh and allowing them all – except for Kurt and Blaine himself – to leave Blaine’s apartment in reasonably high spirits.


End file.
